'Smart' Tuesday Genesis

Preface:

How Shit Happens

In the beginning was the plan…

And then came the assumptions

And the assumptions were without form

And the plan was completely without substance

And the darkness was upon the face of the Employees

And they spoke amongst themselves, saying:

“It is a crock of shit and it stinks”

And the Employees went unto their Supervisors, saying:

“It is a pail of dung and none may abide the odor thereof”

And the Supervisors went unto their Managers saying:

“It is a container of excrement and it is very strong such that none may abide by it.”

And the Managers went unto the General Manager, saying:

“It is a vessel of fertilizer and none may abide its strength”

And the General Manager went unto the Chief Executive Officer saying:

“It contains that which aids plant growth and it is very strong”

And the Chief Executive Officer went unto the Chairman saying:

“It promotes growth and is very powerful”

And the Chairman went unto the Board of Directors, saying:

“This new plan will actively promote the growth and efficiency of this organization and these areas in particular”

And the Board of Directors looked upon the plan and saw that it was good

And the plan became policy.

This is how shit happens.

--from Hank Warren’s It Simply Must be Said: A View of American Education from the Trenches of Teaching

I’ve been thinking about how this applies to the new clusterf#*k Lickspittle High is embarking upon called “Smart Tuesday.” I’m thinking it goes like this:

Smart Tuesday Genesis

In the beginning Lady Lickspittle created “Smart Tuesday.”

And it was without form.

And the spirit of confusion hovered over the faces of the staff.

And they spake of their confusion and asked for form.

And then Lady Lickspittle said, “Let there be form,”

And bade us “get into thy PLCs and so create form.”

And as Lady Lickspittle called the night Day, and the day Night, we divided like the firmament from the earth and waters into what we discovered

were really our departments.

And the departments gathered amongst their own for the entirety of the next moon,

Thinking they with dominion over pedagogical expertise

And with a genuine desire to create a workable intervention program

Might offer fruitful and intelligent design to Lady Lickspittle’s

Yet formless “Smart Tuesday.”

And she nodded, for seeing them working was very good.

And because the mornings of the fourth day would provide for more

Curricular continuity, the staff offered the idea of

“Smart Thursdays” instead

And for these there was form

And for these there was consistency

And for these there was intervention

And for these there was teacher buy-in.

But Lady Lickspittle said

“On the educational system tree fruits hang high and low,

but the apples of decisions, staff shall not pluck nor eat,

No, no!”

And the staff blinked mystified when

Lady Lickspittle sent her messenger

The assistant principal to apprise the staff

of their mistake

and that “Smart Tuesday”

regardless of thorns and thistles and

lack of form

is created in Her image

and as such

shall not be questioned.

And shall commence without such form

on October 25th.

And a flood of students shall

wander campus on that day

and for at least three Tuesdays thereafter.

And they shall wander without direction

and will not be paired by real learning needs in any

meaningful way with staff.

And the staff looked at the situation and said,

“this is not good.”