Why not...

My last of twenty-seven years in the secondary classroom, my baby just now in college, a government and economy looking like something out of Duck Soup, a pituitary tumor, chronic migraines... Hell, why not write a blog?

(My students are now gone. I'm now a civilian and really no longer a "lame duck." I hope the readers of Mama Duck will come to my new blog for some new writing and new directions. My new blog is at: Writing Isle to Isle.)

Friday, October 14, 2011

'Smart' Tuesday Genesis


How Shit Happens

In the beginning was the plan…
And then came the assumptions
And the assumptions were without form
And the plan was completely without substance
And the darkness was upon the face of the Employees
And they spoke amongst themselves, saying:
“It is a crock of shit and it stinks”
And the Employees went unto their Supervisors, saying:
“It is a pail of dung and none may abide the odor thereof”
And the Supervisors went unto their Managers saying:
“It is a container of excrement and it is very strong such that none may abide by it.”
And the Managers went unto the General Manager, saying:
“It is a vessel of fertilizer and none may abide its strength”
And the General Manager went unto the Chief Executive Officer saying:
“It contains that which aids plant growth and it is very strong”
And the Chief Executive Officer went unto the Chairman saying:
“It promotes growth and is very powerful”
And the Chairman went unto the Board of Directors, saying:
“This new plan will actively promote the growth and efficiency of this organization and these areas in particular”
And the Board of Directors looked upon the plan and saw that it was good
And the plan became policy.
This is how shit happens.

--from Hank Warren’s It Simply Must be Said: A View of American Education from the Trenches of Teaching

I’ve been thinking about how this applies to the new clusterf#*k Lickspittle High is embarking upon called “Smart Tuesday.” I’m thinking it goes like this:

Smart Tuesday Genesis

In the beginning Lady Lickspittle created “Smart Tuesday.”
And it was without form.
And the spirit of confusion hovered over the faces of the staff.
And they spake of their confusion and asked for form.
And then Lady Lickspittle said, “Let there be form,”
And bade us “get into thy PLCs and so create form.”
And as Lady Lickspittle called the night Day, and the day Night, we divided like the firmament from the earth and waters into what we discovered
were really our departments.
And the departments gathered amongst their own for the entirety of the next moon,
Thinking they with dominion over pedagogical expertise
And with a genuine desire to create a workable intervention program
Might offer fruitful and intelligent design to Lady Lickspittle’s
Yet formless “Smart Tuesday.”
And she nodded, for seeing them working was very good.

And because the mornings of the fourth day would provide for more
Curricular continuity, the staff offered the idea of
“Smart Thursdays” instead
And for these there was form
And for these there was consistency
And for these there was intervention
And for these there was teacher buy-in.

But Lady Lickspittle said
“On the educational system tree fruits hang high and low,
but the apples of decisions, staff shall not pluck nor eat,
No, no!”

And the staff blinked mystified when
Lady Lickspittle sent her messenger
The assistant principal to apprise the staff
of their mistake
and that “Smart Tuesday”
regardless of thorns and thistles and
lack of form
is created in Her image
and as such
shall not be questioned.
And shall commence without such form
on October 25th.

And a flood of students shall
wander campus on that day
and for at least three Tuesdays thereafter.
And they shall wander without direction
and will not be paired by real learning needs in any
meaningful way with staff.

And the staff looked at the situation and said,
“this is not good.”

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